{"id":829,"date":"2026-07-21T14:55:21","date_gmt":"2026-07-21T21:55:21","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/2026\/07\/21\/bigender-identity-journal-entry\/"},"modified":"2026-07-21T14:55:21","modified_gmt":"2026-07-21T21:55:21","slug":"bigender-identity-journal-entry","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/2026\/07\/21\/bigender-identity-journal-entry\/","title":{"rendered":"bigender identity journal entry"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>i passed 3 tween girls doing a coordinated dance for tiktok on a walk<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>recognition: that&#8217;s me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"350\" height=\"350\" data-attachment-id=\"828\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/img_1683\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/img_1683.jpg?fit=350%2C350&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"350,350\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;1&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"img_1683\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/img_1683.jpg?fit=350%2C350&amp;ssl=1\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/img_1683.jpg?resize=350%2C350&#038;ssl=1\" class=\"wp-image-828\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/img_1683.jpg?w=350&amp;ssl=1 350w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/img_1683.jpg?resize=300%2C300&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/img_1683.jpg?resize=150%2C150&amp;ssl=1 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 350px) 100vw, 350px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<div style=\"height:24px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>memory: when i was a kid, i wanted to play jump rope and hand-clapping games with the girls, instead of kickball and four-square. the boys were always trying to win, and would spike the ball; girls were smiling at each other, clapping hands and hugging.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>i tried a couple of times to fit into these girl groups, but it was awkward, and i just gave up. i went to a different school every year, but that aspect of social life was always the same, as was my inner sense of association.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>it was like not being allowed to be myself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>i passed 3 tween girls doing a coordinated dance for tiktok on a walk recognition: that&#8217;s me. memory: when i was a kid, i wanted to play jump rope and hand-clapping games with the girls, instead of kickball and four-square. the boys were always trying to win, and would spike the ball; girls were smiling &#8230; <a title=\"bigender identity journal entry\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/2026\/07\/21\/bigender-identity-journal-entry\/\" aria-label=\"Read more about bigender identity journal entry\">Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[29,124,31,14,26,15,9],"tags":[172,157,423,13,425,236,424,61,158,162,426,167],"class_list":["post-829","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-chronicle","category-education","category-innerlog","category-neurodiversity","category-personal-narrative","category-politics","category-reflection","tag-belonging","tag-bigender","tag-childhood","tag-education","tag-exclusion","tag-gender-identity","tag-inclusion","tag-neurodiversity","tag-neuroqueer","tag-nonbinary","tag-play","tag-pride"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/paor1p-dn","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":840,"url":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/2026\/07\/22\/spectra\/","url_meta":{"origin":829,"position":0},"title":"spectra","author":"Ryk Groetchen","date":"July 22, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"i grew up in a biracial household where Blackness, white passing, and whiteness were all intertwined, as a neuroqueer, bigender, autistic child with high justice sensitivity, but low hierarchy awareness. being late-diagnosed, i didn't have names for a lot of my experiences, but looking back, it all makes perfect sense.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;chronicle&quot;","block_context":{"text":"chronicle","link":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/category\/chronicle\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/img_9444.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/img_9444.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/img_9444.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/img_9444.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":771,"url":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/2026\/06\/09\/to-a-young-person-questioning-themselves\/","url_meta":{"origin":829,"position":1},"title":"to a young person questioning themselves","author":"Ryk Groetchen","date":"June 9, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"I\u2019m 60Mf (that\u2019s how I\u2019ve been indicating a male-presenting femme-relating person). I\u2019ve always known that I\u2019m different on the inside, and I\u2019m so glad that it is becoming normalized to express ourselves about the nuances of our experiences relative to gender. I\u2019ve also recently been diagnosed AuDHD, and that has\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;chronicle&quot;","block_context":{"text":"chronicle","link":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/category\/chronicle\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/06\/img_1188.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/06\/img_1188.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/06\/img_1188.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/06\/img_1188.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/06\/img_1188.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":858,"url":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/2026\/08\/17\/normalize-casual-intimacy\/","url_meta":{"origin":829,"position":2},"title":"Normalize casual intimacy.","author":"Ryk Groetchen","date":"August 17, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"I\u2019m a bi-gender person\u2014masc and femme together in parallel unison. Like a Tootsie Roll, a Twinkie, a Ho-Ho, or a KitKat, I have a more brittle, masc outer layer; and a creamy, femme inner core. The femme part of me has been surprised when I have proposed activities to femme\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;chronicle&quot;","block_context":{"text":"chronicle","link":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/category\/chronicle\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/img_1782.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/img_1782.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/img_1782.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/img_1782.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/img_1782.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":824,"url":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/2026\/07\/18\/unkind-binaries\/","url_meta":{"origin":829,"position":3},"title":"unkind binaries","author":"Ryk Groetchen","date":"July 18, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"this is one kind of harm caused by the abled\/disabled binary when it is applied as a permanent designation to people: it erases from view the environment that enables or disables a person, and it makes invisible all of the ways that the environment is designed to enable the abled\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;didactics&quot;","block_context":{"text":"didactics","link":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/category\/didactics\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/img_1667.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/img_1667.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/img_1667.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/img_1667.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/img_1667.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/img_1667.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":737,"url":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/2026\/03\/31\/on-trans-visibility-day\/","url_meta":{"origin":829,"position":4},"title":"on trans visibility day","author":"Ryk Groetchen","date":"March 31, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"Perusing reddit today, I noticed someone posted about wanting to start a men\u2019s group and asking for fun ideas. Many of the comments were followed by an enthusiastic \u201cyes!\u201d or other signifiers of feeling seen. Nothing in the post spoke to my identity or special interests. I don't point this\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;chronicle&quot;","block_context":{"text":"chronicle","link":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/category\/chronicle\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/03\/IMG_1188.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/03\/IMG_1188.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/03\/IMG_1188.jpeg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/03\/IMG_1188.jpeg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/03\/IMG_1188.jpeg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":783,"url":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/2026\/06\/15\/know-what-youre-doing\/","url_meta":{"origin":829,"position":5},"title":"know what you\u2019re doing","author":"Ryk Groetchen","date":"June 15, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"there's no decolonization without dismantling the gender binary. the intersectional person is the one who binds community\u2014because they actually understand and empathize with everyone. countries and communities who stigmatize nonbinary identity and orientation are doing white colonizers' work: one-drop purity tests don't build you up\u2014they prove you're not good enough.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;chronicle&quot;","block_context":{"text":"chronicle","link":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/category\/chronicle\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/06\/img_1490.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/06\/img_1490.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/06\/img_1490.png?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/06\/img_1490.png?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/829","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=829"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/829\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=829"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=829"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ryk.groetchen.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=829"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}