Respectability politics

To the many brave voices calling out Peter Coyote’s advice regarding peaceful demonstration tactics as representative of an entitled, race- and class-based, and performative nod to respectability politics:

I hear you, and I recognize this perspective.

I would challenge that perspective as confusing symbology with strategy.

I see it as being based on a false premise: that in calling for a certain degree of decorum and unified expression, the advocate for peaceful protest is somehow denying or vilifying people’s real human feelings and expressions of rage (as a response to real injustice) for purposes of appearance or respectability.

On the contrary – I am hearing in Coyote’s advice an acknowledgment of those real and valid responses, while asking for a consideration of the best strategic outlets for such impulses, especially given that this type of demonstration is leaderless and represents a great number of different underlying motivations.

From the vantage point of home, seeing a demonstration through the singular lens of the media, it may appear that the great tide is unified and is speaking truth to power in one voice. If you have ever been in this type of heavily charged environment, involving deadly force and righteous rage, this is rarely the case. Friends witness friends acting in ways that do not align with their values, and alliances can become fragmented very quickly. What begins as a unified demonstration of resistance to abuse of power can quickly devolve into groups of caretakers trying to protect the wounded, while surrounded by the contrasting forces of earnest perseverance and scorched earth immediacy.

And, though some of the victims of these scenarios, (the ones who are lionized as fallen soldiers in the cause, and remembered), are indeed victimized by the representatives of the power structure being protested, often the majority of victims are simply bystanders, or families that happen to live in the area. Often they end up being the very people that the protest was organized to defend. No one remembers their names, but the trauma continues to be passed on.

The myth of the righteous martyr, whose rage is a spear that flies directly into the heart of the oppressor, resulting in shockwaves that reverberate through the body of the beast, resulting in it’s inevitable demise, is just that: a myth. Yet if we really examine our own minds, who will honestly say that a part of themselves is not silently anticipating the moment when they can be a part of that myth’s realization?

What I am hearing from Coyote’s entreaty to practice discipline is this:

Your rage is real, and it is justified. I encourage you to explore and express it in creative ways that heal and nourish you and your community.

Having done that, we face today a real enemy, who is heavily armed and looking for a justification to unleash its weapons, and who thinks nothing of grinding your bones into the pavement for spectacle.

Some of us will die today. Though your spirit longs to exact justice for your cause with the immediate response of your justifiable rage, the blind force behind the weapons we face will lash out at anything that moves. Let them be the ones to move. In this square, on this day, in our action, we are many, but in our stillness, we are one.

If we present the face of chaos, it is easy for them to spin the situation in their favor – they become the force of order. But if we present a face of unity, calm, and dignity, it will not only be difficult for them to present a justification for their actions, but they are also likely to act against their own, as they leap to attack anything that moves.

Some of us will die today. We can either die in our personal expression of rage, or we can die in our unified expression of solidarity and embodiment of peace. Consider the reach of our combined forces. Though we all experience this rage, in this moment, are enough of us ready to hurl ourselves into the barrels of their guns simultaneously? And will that combined force be enough to vanquish our foe? And if not, will that action be a sure step on the path to defeating them, finally and assuredly?

If yes, let us remember these faces we witness now as we jump into the abyss, together, sanctifying our cause and ensuring freedom for our people, knowing that whoever is in power will write a version of history that judges us kindly, if they remember us at all.

If there is doubt, let us consider minimizing the casualties, as there is no shame in protecting our neighbors, and endless merit in safeguarding one life.

And, as it is June, let us embody, together, the great stone wall that represents our power in diversity in the face of adversity.

Let’s do this, people!

But being a Zen teacher, Peter Coyote has been trained to use an economy of words. Where I have gone on and on, boring my potential allies, he puts it much more succinctly:

Wake up.
Vent at home.
In public, practice discipline and self control.

It takes much more courage.

An inconvenient truth

It’s not that kindness is a moral imperative because it’s convenient. Kindness is a moral imperative because unkindness done to one turns that one’s grandchildren into monsters who will return that unkindness a thousandfold.

Even if the unkindness being done to Palestinians were to stop today, with all of the trauma that has been inflicted upon those children, what does the world have to look forward to in 80 years?

When will we begin to think about the effects of our actions on other people’s grandchildren first, rather than condemning our own to suffer the consequences?

Taste the Rainbow

Understanding human cognitive bias, and the psychophysical mechanisms that compartmentalize our experience so that we can navigate in a world of endless variation, let us recognize that the rainbow is not actually made up of discrete bands of color – that is an illusion created by our senses.

As comforting as it may be to align ourselves with one band of color in the rainbow, let us also be able to abandon ourselves to the imperceptible spaces between the bands, as disorienting and vulnerable as that may feel.

We truly are one, and truly need one another to understand the whole.

That sounds very Berkeley. I own it.

If we let go of the idea that we are responsible for knowing everything about the world, and accept that we are actually co-responsible, how much more important is every relationship? How much more care do we take in articulating our perspective? How much more deeply do we listen, and in listening, build connections to parts of the world that we are incapable of hearing, but for our connection with others?

Do you feel me? Who will listen?

Happy Pride!

The language of inclusion

Neurodiversity, like gender diversity, sexual orientation diversity, racial diversity, is just language to describe the vast territory of human variation. Where once our language was simple, our categories few, and our understanding limited, we now are able to talk about our unique being in the world with recognition, empathy, and nuanced respect.

At one time we only had names for the large and small lights in the sky: Sun, moon, stars. Then we began to see patterns, and so the Constellations formed. The deeper we look, the more we learn about the nature and vastness of existence itself. And suddenly, we can print volumes and fill institutions with the great variety of language that we have to describe what was always there.

We have only relatively recently had the tools to be able to look into the nuances of human diversity beyond the realm of human cognitive bias. What we might think of as new has always been part of the human experience in a way that we may not have developed language for–or that the biases of powerful societies have erased as they absorb and subsume older ones, whose languages are often more nuanced.

The next time someone tells you that the neurological orientation we call ADHD is caused by video games, or that vaccines cause autism, or that sexual orientation can be prayed away, or that being trans is a lifestyle choice, or that it’s a sin to marry outside of one’s race, ask them if they believe in a world beyond the constellations.

Ask them if they believe the moon landing was faked. Ask them if they believe the moon is made of cheese, or that the Earth is flat and the sun is extinguished in the ocean every night. Because what they are really saying is that they are clinging to a world of simple categories that they can understand. Pity them, but please, do not fail to educate them.

Remind them that we are more alike than different, even as we are infinitely individually unique. Remind them that we all have hordes of tiny insects living around the base of our eyelashes, and that there are bacteria living in our intestines that are waiting only for us to perish so they can make our nutrients available to the grass.

Remind them that neurodiversity, gender diversity, sexual orientation diversity, racial diversity, are not any more threatening to them than those organisms that inhabit their bodies, that on the contrary, they actually affirm the community of beings that each one is, including them. Remind them that we, as a species, are successful because of our diversity, rather than in spite of it. Remind them that inclusion includes them, too, as they cling to their paper glider as it hurtles through the vastness of space.

Happy Pride!

Asking for an end to violence needs no qualification

If one recognizes the Palestinian people as equally human to oneself, one will experience no moral dilemma as one simultaneously condemns their slaughter, starvation, and displacement; and desires that Hamas-held hostages be released.

On the other hand, if one finds oneself making statements which include clauses such as “sad, but,” or “you’re ignoring the hostages” or “you hate [the state or people starting with ‘I’ or the people starting with ‘J’] when someone condemns the genocide, one is experiencing the belief that human beings exist on a spectrum, and that certain tribal/political/ethnic/religious groups of people are more human, more deserving of respect and dignity, than others.

This has been covered before. “Black Lives Matter” does not need to be qualified with “All Lives Matter.” “Stop the genocide” does not need to be qualified with “bring home the hostages.” In demanding so, one’s bias is revealed.

If one is not hearing “bring home the hostages,” then one has tuned out the roar of US dollars and weapons flooding the region, which are louder and more powerful than all of the voices calling for an end to the genocide.

This machine kills fascists

Woody Guthrie was a DJ. He used the power of the social media of his time to spread the message of anti-fascism and pro-democracy. Pete Seeger had a television show. He used the power of social media to highlight outspoken advocates for social justice in song. Nina Simone used her platform to expose the abuses of power and hypocrisy in our society and our government. Paul Robeson traveled the world and spoke out at his concerts, championing anti-fascist causes in the US and abroad. Teresa Teng encoded revolutionary messages into her pop songs. Victor Jara lost his life for using his artistry to inspire people to defend democracy and resist authoritarianism.

All of these people were blacklisted, repressed, investigated, and trivialized by the systems of power they spoke and sang against. And many regular people went along with the program, belittling them as corny, or fringe, or eccentric, or out of touch with reality. Many people who look back on these figures as heroes might have ignored or laughed at them in their heyday.

Sometimes revolution is ignored in its time, only to be looked back upon with wistful reverence.

To heck with that.

Anyone who is called to inspire their people to coordinated action for the common good knows that the work is not sexy, and will not result in accolades or personal gain. Often, it seems like the people who are most responsible for igniting our spark are the least willing to engage in our efforts. Nevertheless, our passion and our recognition of the moment compels us to continue to reach out, connect, educate, and build alliances through whatever networks we have available to us. It’s a face-to-face, word-of-mouth, phone-call-in-the-middle-of-the-night kind of thing.

Whose side are you on? Will you hear the call?

Music Class In Uncertain Times

This is a post that I sent to my ukulele students.

Many people consider taking a music class at some point in their lives. Studying an instrument or using your voice in new ways can be a little bit challenging, and I think people think about doing these activities when things are peaceful, and they are feeling expansive, like they have some “wiggle room” in their schedule. That makes sense.

That being said, my own music practice has grown out of my tendency to focus on music at times in my life that were difficult. For me, playing music and singing is a powerful emotional regulation tool–when life is feeling chaotic or overwhelming, musical activity helps me focus on parts of myself that I can control and nurture.

I may have spent the whole day at work having to bite my tongue or not express my difficult feelings about my working atmosphere, but then I can come home and channel all of those feelings into a musical activity that helps to lower my heart rate, regulate my breathing, and stimulate my creative mind. I can learn to play a song that I then share with my friends or family, which creates a sense of shared experience, which also helps to relieve my stress and help me feel connected to my community.

So, even though taking on the challenge of learning an instrument might seem like an extra thing to have to manage in a busy schedule, that time that we spend making music can provide a welcome balance to our regular working life.

ADHD Journey: 1 month in

So far so good. After 2 weeks on meds and a consultation with the pharmacist, I doubled the original dose, and i don’t see increasing any more going forward. My sleep patterns have stabilized and I am actually sleeping more and deeper. This is probably in part due to the fact that I am no longer napping in the afternoon, so at night I am actually tired and fall right asleep.

My step count is on point, and for the last week I have averaged 5 miles a day. I am down 15 pounds from my January weight. I do sometimes forget to eat, but I’m not actually skipping meals, and I have less of a tendency to just clean my plate on principle.

This is all great, but what about my attention? This is a little more difficult to wrap up succinctly. I have continued to experience a decrease in “background noise” that would pull me away from a task. I have also noticed a subtle but unambiguous change in my connection with my current instrument, the ukulele. I have always had a difficult time internalizing and retaining patterns–I have to practice a lot to memorize and integrate new material, and even then it doesn’t always “stick.” It seems lately that the circuits seem to be firing a bit more smoothly. Not a dramatic change by any means, but noticeable and welcome.

What medication hasn’t helped with is the sense of panic and dread I feel from situational sources: caring for and managing the affairs of a loved one with dementia; a marked downward trend in enrollment in music classes, my source of income; parenting a neurodivergent teen who, like me, learns everything the hard way and navigates a world that wasn’t necessarily designed for him; and watching the failure of our justice system and legislature to stop the dismantling of our hard-won civil liberties, environmental protections, and social safety net. All I can do is focus on the task at hand and avoid ruminating, and with that I feel more vulnerable and see fewer options each day. My instinct for self-preservation has seemedly not increased with my ability to focus.

My mind’s tendency toward world-building seems to continue unchecked as well–there is an unrelenting “impossible dream” that a big part of my consciousness is trying to realize, which saps a great deal of the energy which I feel should go into organizing my activities into a sustainable livelihood.
Well, that’s that. To be continued …